Of Tuxes and Titillations
by skittellgirl
Summary: I't isn't easy finding garb for a wedding. From the "Going to the Chapel" series.


Title: The "Going to the Chapel" series- Part One: Of Tuxes and Titillations

Summary: It isn't easy trying to find the right garb for a wedding

Rating: The standard, don't be shocked

Author's Notes: To copswife0819, I was already considering using this title, and when you made that comment to my last story, I figured it was destiny! Thanks!

Disclaimers: I obviously don't own them, but you know who does. Please give them back! Please! (sobs).

Vicki Nelson sat in the apartment she shared with her fiancé, trying not to scream out loud. She had spent the last hour and a half perusing bridal magazines with her assistant and maid of honor, Correen, trying to find a dress for her wedding that didn't make her look like a wedding cake or want to vomit at the sight of it. Correen had suggested many options, but Vicki had shot them all down, remarking things like "where would I stash my asp in that thing?" or "yeah, if I wanna look like a Disney princess, complete with vacant smile." She grinned to herself, recalling when Correen had suggested a lacy white dress, and she had rebuked her with the comment, "White? Correen, Henry alone and you've gotta be kidding me." Correen had finally given up, standing up and remarking, "fine, if you wanna marry a guy as hot as Henry in pair of freakin' jeans, be my guest." Vicki had merely told her that she would if she could, and Correen, exasperated, had left, telling Vicki that she hoped the guys were having better luck at the tux place than they were.

She was startled out of her thoughts by the ringing of her cell phone. She picked it up, and smiled as she said, "Hey, Henry, what's going on?"

"Victoria," Henry tersely began. "Remind me again why in the name of Jesu Michael Celluci is in my wedding party."

Vicki sighed. They had been having a version of this conversation ever since she had asked Mike to serve as her "man of honor" along with Correen. "What did he do now?" she asked.

"Well, I'm sorry, but I believe that the fact that we are to be wed in the eyes of God requires a little solemnity. Not only does he refuse to do so, he keeps making cracks about our reception. I swear if he asks me one more time if we are going to have O negative at the bar, I'm going to-"

"Henry," Vicki interrupted, suddenly very tired. "You know how Mike is. He's only trying to rile you. Please tell me it's not working. Besides, you're supposed to be the mature one."

"It is difficult at times," he admitted, his animosity slowly draining away. "At least Stephen isn't such an disrespectful boob. I can see what Correen sees in him."

"So can I," smiled Vicki. A thought entered her head, a particularly mischievous one. "Henry? Are you alone?"

"Yes, I am," he replied, confused. "I persuaded the owner to allow me to use his office for a private call."

"Hmm… you persuaded, huh?" she asked teasingly, and he grinned. "Well, maybe I used a little personal charm."

"I'll bet," she replied. "Lock the door."

"What?" he asked, head perked up.

"You know your hearing is better than that. Do it."

Completely and utterly confused, Henry did as was requested. He walked back over to the desk, and said, "Um, I did what you asked. What in the name of God-"

"Just trust me," she replied. "Sit down in the office chair. And hang up the phone."

Henry, completely bewildered, did as she had asked. He sat there for a moment in silence, wondering what the hell was going on. Then he felt it. A pair of hands massaging his temples. He jerked up in shock, and heard Vicki's voice in his head, soothing him. "Relax, honey, it's okay. It's me."

"How-how are you doing this?" he thought back, stunned. She replied, "I've been studying on how to improve our connection. I've been getting help from Betty and Stephen. I was going to save this for the honeymoon, but I think you could use it now."

"Vicki, that's- no one has ever been able to do this before. Not that I find it in any way amazing that you could. You are truly special," he told her, and she smiled broadly.

"Well, if you think I'm special now-" she saucily told him, and began to trail her phantom hands lower, resting them on his shoulders. She took her phantom lips and began to nibble on his earlobe, and he gasped. "Vicki-" he started.

"Well," she replied, all the while still speaking to him in his head, "since mean old Mike has been teasing you in a bad way, I thought that I would tease you in a nicer way." She grinned, and began to work her lips down his neck, breathing hot on it. She knew it felt as real for him as if she were actually there, and she felt herself being turned on as well. She told him, "Put your phone back on and leave it on speaker. I want to hear you moan."

He barely had enough sense of consciousness to do so. She smiled when she heard the beep on her end of the phone, and spoke aloud, "Enjoying yourself, Henry?"

"You, you wicked, wanton, woman," he gasped, as she was fully caressing his body now while kissing his neck, a hot spot she knew would turn him on beyond reason. She grinned, and said, "Oh, now, Henry, flattery will only get you everywhere."

"Oh dear God, what are you going to do to me?" he whispered. She smiled, and said, "Well, you remember how much fun you had with me when you taught me about this? I'm gonna have that much fun with you."

"Ohh… sweet Jesu," he gasped, his body relaxing in some spots and tightening in others. She chuckled softly, the sound only inflaming him more. She proceeded to kiss every single inch of his neck while he moaned and growled in pleasure. She moved her phantom lips and hands down his chest, over his well muscled back, and down to the rear end she loved so much. She squeezed him there, enjoying the sound of the loud growl that elicited. She had yet to touch him where he craved it most, though, and he was dizzy with need and arousal. "Vicki, please, touch me," he begged.

"I am touching you," she replied sweetly, feeling the heat in her body growing as well. "You have to be more specific, darling."

"You, you tease," he moaned. "Please, Vicki, touch me where I need it most. Please."

"Well, since you asked nicely," she replied, echoing the words she had used when she first accepted the date that had led them to this place. He growled loudly when her phantom lips engulfed his manhood, and she worked him until he came to release. Although she wasn't expecting it at all, she found her own release when he met his, and she was panting just as loudly as he was when they were both coming down from their highs.

"Was it as good for you as it was for me?" she asked cockily, and he grinned. "Indeed, it was darling. When I get home, I'd recommend you be naked, though. I'd hate to have to ruin even more of your clothing by ripping it off of your body."

"I will take it under advisement," she replied, grinning yet again. "Now are you feeling able to continue the tux search? You know, without killing my best friend and draining him dry?"

"I believe so," sighed Henry. "I had better get out there before Mike thinks I have left a body trail. I love you and can't wait to see you again."

"I love you too, Henry." she replied. He hung up the phone, and with a Cheshire grin planted on his face, walked back out to join Mike and Stephen.

"Hey, Fang Boy," Mike greeted him. "What, your latest bite didn't wanna give it up quite so quickly?"

Henry just looked at Mike and grinned. He walked over to Stephen, shook his hand furiously, and whispered to him, "Thank you."

"What's with him?" asked Mike. Stephen grinned, and said, "Well, if I didn't know better, I'd think he had just been laid."

"What?" Mike gasped. "That's impossible-right?"

Henry and Stephen just looked at one another, grinning. They walked to the door of the shop, and Mike followed them, going "Hey, Stephen, Fitzroy, come on, what's going on? Guys?"

At home, Vicki laughed softly to herself. "Nice of Henry to still leave the phone on speaker," she thought to herself. She hung up, and smiling to herself, pulled out the book that Henry had given her on the night of his proposal. She turned to the last page, and smiled to herself. "Correen is gonna be so happy when she finds out I found a dress," she thought, looking at the drawing and smiling. She looked at her clothes, remembered Henry's warning, and shrugged to herself. "Oh, hell, I never liked these things anyway," she thought. She got up, and went to the kitchen for something to eat. "Something tells me I will need the energy," she thought happily as the door closed behind her.


End file.
